OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
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