Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
