Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
