dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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