I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I woke up under a house in Key West
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