He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
