i dedicated my morning wood to you.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Randomize