just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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