i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Randomize