I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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