I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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