Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
