This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Randomize
