I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
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