so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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