shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
