Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
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