doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
