but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
pop tarts are not kleenex
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
They have beer where we have blood.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
