when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
