my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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