Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Randomize
