...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
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