I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
