Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Sext me about skeletons
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Randomize
