There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
My vagina is very pro this idea
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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