My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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