I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
