Someone shit on the floor
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
