you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Randomize