Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
We left an ass print on the piano.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
