Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Randomize
