I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
