what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
