have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
