Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Randomize
