She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize
