Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize