how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
