so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
