do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
