Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Randomize
