Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Don't EVER smell your tampon
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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