Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
what day is it and did you see me today?
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
