I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
