We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
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