are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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