Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
