My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize