she was so not down for the gang bang
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
