home. puking in laundry basket.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
